Thoughts, Engagements, and Updates

28 Apr 2014

Five Secrets to Excellence of Self


Winston Churchill spent most of his life in polities. His career encompassed numerous failures and disappointments. His father, Sir Randolph Churchill, never believed his son would make such much of himself, despite his continual effort to do so. Winston lost office and switched political parties more than once. He repeatedly teetered on the brink of bankruptcy. Yet on May 10, 1940, he finally became Prime Minister of Britain.

Harry Truman’s early life was, as Churchill is, filled with disappointments. He suffered bankruptcy. Being a plainspoken, ordinary man, he was often overlooked. He was usually an underdog in elections in which he ran. He was the third Vice President to serve under Franklin Roosevelt. His presidency, beginning when he was 61, was much like Churchill’s role as prime minister, largely unexpected. In each case, the men served with distinction and changed the course of history.

After reading through the life biographies of these two great men, I have summarized these five great qualities for your digest. I believe they will help you become better at what you do.



Recently, my friends began to make jokes about my fidgeting weakness. It was only of recent that I realized it was a weakness. For some of my life-brothers and sisters out there that life may seem too slow for, I empathize with your quest. I’m not a slow lad either. The world just won’t understand our rush. I just cannot help it myself. I am too impatient. However, I have come to discover that one of the most difficult tasks ever is to discern if God is using our current situation to open doors to new opportunities or whether our present situation is orchestrated by the devil. Most people I know of express dissatisfaction with where they are, especially when they are facing a job transition phase that is raising vexing concerns. Of course, I don’t have answers for them, just more vexing questions. But I know that God has you in that seemingly uncomfortable state for a reason.

Don’t ever underestimate the mind blowing power of patience, especially when things seem not to work out as we had hoped. God’s plan often requires patience and character, but if we are willing to remain faithful and unmovable in our state of “alert-expectancy”, we are never left shortchanged (Rom. 5:3-5). You need the awesome power of patience to come up with a brilliant plan. So make plans while you wait on the Lord.



Don’t ever think of giving up on what you’ve started. It could be your vision, family, or dream. I dare to say, if you have never thought of giving up on what you do, or what you ask, then, you have never started anything worthwhile at all.

Psychologists believe that a parent-child relationship has much to do almost about everything in life. If an individual experiences difficulty in his or her relationship with their early caregivers while growing up, such experience tends to affect the way, the individual sees the world in general. You will notice that the many reason why most people lack courage is due to their relationship experience with their early caregivers.

If Jane’s parents, for example, often criticize her for failing and always chew her out to be on top of her class, surely she will grow up struggling to believe in herself.

It is to this that I dare claim that much more of the problems associated with our lack of courage has to do with how we were brought up.

The reason why you lack courage, most times, is not really that you are afraid but because your parents never believed in you when you were a child. Now you are a full-grown man or women, still struggling with the spats of the past. And if you don’t realize that this is the issue, then you will keep on struggling to believe in yourself in the face of an unbecoming danger or event. But really, what can you ever achieve in this world without courage? Courage to ask. Courage to fight. Courage to be patient. In fact, every aspect of life requires some kind of courage. Who wins without ever taking risk anyway? Nobody! We need to find courage as well to support those we claim to love.



Have you ever felt the rush of confidence drizzling through your veins? For those of us who may have experienced such state of hype and swagger, please stay focused and be who you were born to be. It was said that in an earlier age, military might and physical strength were often as important as your vision for the future and your ability to delegate. It was a prerequisite for leadership, especially in times of warfare. People of size and muscles automatically gained the loyalty of followers. People who were not tall or particularly muscular were at a distinct disadvantage. Over the years, we have seen people like the relatively diminutive Napoleon Bonaparte, standing at five-feet six inches, driven as much by confidence as he was by his ambition to rule the world.

Go for whatever you think that can enhance your confidence. Find the right look for yourself. Gym and nurture the right physique, if required. Dress with dapperness and do whatever necessary to stay on top of your game in confidence.

Indeed, you need to be confident with your vision. It starts with being confident in thyself. One cannot break the ice of inferiority if he/she does not boldly step out in faith to win. The clock is running. Make the most of today. Time waits for no man. The thin line between failure and success is simply the blurry line of confidence.

Why not chose to believe in yourself and in your own abilities. The world is waiting for you to break out of your inferior zone and come to the bright side of life.



Field Marshall Lord Allenby was a brilliant World War 1 commander who led in the overthrow of the Ottoman Empire’s control over the Middle East, liberating both Jerusalem and Damascus. Allenby appeared fearless and radiated confidence. He could be relentless in attack. His biographer noted that Allenby was never recognized as a great leader, nor was he as popular with his men as one might have supposed when compared to his success. This was due in part because Allenby lacked a measure of self-control, a little humanity, the power to communicate enthusiasm, and to inspire disciples. According to Wavell Archibald in his book Allenby, in which he concludes that Allenby’s sudden explosions of temper, his occasional, almost childish petulance, did his reputation more harm than good. Owing to the fact that he never worried to correct the impression his weakness created.

For starters, people can be extremely frustrating. Their foolish actions can harm your organization and even cause you numerous problems. But often your greatness as a leader is not measured by the decibel level you reach as you chew out your colleagues, but by the self-control and maturity you demonstrate as you seek a solution.

God is fully aware of our human frailties. He knows too well the grief some of the foolish choices we make will cost us. Yet He relates to us graciously. He is slow to anger, in the same manner He wants us to act towards others. Seek to change others rather than berating those around you.



We are bad ––fantastically bad! We do not care to respect or consider others first before thinking of ourselves. As leaders, we disrespectfully shout on our employees or junior colleagues with disgust simply because of a little wrong they did. Who is even perfect? You? We don’t care whether the man next door is on the verge of losing his sanity because we chose not to listen. We don’t care whether our pastor can pay his children’s school fees with the little stipend from church. We don’t care whether the way we portray ourselves or dress in public stimulate others to sin. One word defines us all: “Selfish”. We are self-seeking. We want to head-on and do whatever we feel like simply because it feels good to us alone.

One morning I read a sign that broke me into tears. It reads, “Be kind than necessary. Everyone is fighting some kind of battle”. Indeed, these stimulating words speak to the human soul.

Think for a second, when last did you reach out to an old friend and asked how they were doing? When last did you celebrate God’s grace upon your life? Really, I’m sure nobody dislikes understanding the suffering of others and wanting to do something about it. You would be amazed that a huge percentage of people do not want to help others because of a bad experience they had in the past. As a result, they reciprocate such action by subliminally redirecting their revenge towards innocent people that are within their compass.

Need I remind you, compassion is not as much what we do, as it is who we are out of love ––a state where God’s Word and our deeds are in harmony? Turn your rage into positive and do to people what you want them to do to you.

In any case, compassion should not be required but given. Given because that is what God expects of us. Given because “happiness” is the reward of the compassionate. Please show compassion!

Strive to be better. Strive to be more. Be amazing!

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